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OET (OET-LV) And_finished in/on/at/with_all [the]_men the_married women foreign until day one of_the_month the_first.
Note 1 topic: figures-of-speech / idiom
וַיְכַלּ֣וּ בַכֹּ֔ל אֲנָשִׁ֕ים
and,finished in/on/at/with,all men
Finished with is an idiom here. Alternate translation: “they succeeded in identifying all the men”
Note 2 topic: figures-of-speech / idiom
הַהֹשִׁ֖יבוּ נָשִׁ֣ים נָכְרִיּ֑וֹת
the,married women/wives foreign
See how you translated this expression in 10:2. Alternate translation: “who had married foreign women”
Note 3 topic: translate-hebrewmonths
עַ֛ד י֥וֹם אֶחָ֖ד לַחֹ֥דֶשׁ הָרִאשֽׁוֹן
until day one(ms) of_the,month the,first
You could convert the Hebrew day and month into an approximate date on the calendar that your culture uses. However, the Jews used a lunar calendar, so if you use a solar calendar, the date will be different every year and the translation will not be entirely accurate. So you may just want to use the numbers of the Hebrew day and month. Alternate translation: “by the first day of the first month”
Note 4 topic: translate-ordinal
עַ֛ד י֥וֹם אֶחָ֖ד לַחֹ֥דֶשׁ הָרִאשֽׁוֹן
until day one(ms) of_the,month the,first
The Hebrew uses a cardinal number here, one, but there is not a significant difference in meaning between that and the way the Hebrew uses an ordinal number, “first,” in similar contexts elsewhere. If your language customarily uses ordinals for the numbers of days, you can do that here in your translation. Alternate translation: “on the first day of the tenth month”
Note 5 topic: figures-of-speech / infostructure
עַ֛ד י֥וֹם אֶחָ֖ד לַחֹ֥דֶשׁ הָרִאשֽׁוֹן
until day one(ms) of_the,month the,first
If it is more natural in your language, you can put this time phrase first in the verse, as in the UST.
OET (OET-LV) And_finished in/on/at/with_all [the]_men the_married women foreign until day one of_the_month the_first.
Note: The OET-RV is still only a first draft, and so far only a few words have been (mostly automatically) matched to the Hebrew or Greek words that they’re translated from.