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OET (OET-LV) If/because the_matter_of it_will_go_forth of_the_queen to all_of the_women husbands_of_their to_make_despicable in_eyes_of_their because_they_will_say the_king ʼAḩashvērōsh he_said to_bring DOM Vashti the_queen before_him and_not she_came.
OET (OET-RV) Soon women all over the empire will hear about what the queen did and they’ll say, ‘King Ahasuerus commanded his servants to bring Queen Vashti to him, but she didn’t go! Then women will stop respecting their husbands.
Towards the end of the feast, when he had drunk too much wine, the king sent a message, ordering the queen to come to him so that he could show off her beauty to his guests. But she probably did not wish to be seen by a crowd of drunken, leering men, and so she refused. The king was very angry about the queen’s disobedience and asked his advisors what the law said about how she should be punished. The advisors said that the king should divorce the queen, in order to show all wives in the empire that they must obey their husbands. The king was pleased with this advice and issued a decree to inform everyone about it.
For the conduct of the queen will become known to all women,
For all the other women in the kingdom will hear what the queen has done,
For all the other women in the kingdom will hear about the way the queen has behaved,
causing them to despise their husbands
and so they will begin also to show disrespect to their husbands.
and as a result they will no longer respect their husbands.
and say, ‘King Xerxes ordered Queen Vashti to be brought before him, but she did not come.’
Instead, they will say that when the king ordered his servants to bring Queen Vashti to him, she refused to come, so why should they obey their husbands.
For they will say, ‘Queen Vashti refused to come to King Xerxes when he sent for her, so we do not need to do what our husbands tell us’
You may need to add something to what the women are reported as saying in order to make it clear why this worried the nobles. The Display shows one way to do this.
Note 1 topic: grammar-connect-logic-result
כִּֽי
that/for/because/then/when
This introduces the reason why Memukan says that Queen Vashti has done wrong against all the men in the kingdom and not only against King Ahasuerus. To show that, you can begin with “This is what will happen.”
Note 2 topic: figures-of-speech / hyperbole
יֵצֵ֤א דְבַר־הַמַּלְכָּה֙ עַל־כָּל־הַנָּשִׁ֔ים
known deed_of of,the_queen on/upon/above/on_account_of//he/it_went_in all/each/any/every the,women
To emphasize his point, Memukan exaggerates and says that every single woman in the empire will hear about Queen Vashti refusing to obey King Ahasuerus. You could say, as UST does, that “women all over the empire” will hear about what the queen did. Or you could preserve Memukan’s manner of speaking by saying, “every woman” will hear.
Note 3 topic: figures-of-speech / metaphor
לְהַבְז֥וֹת בַּעְלֵיהֶ֖ן בְּעֵינֵיהֶ֑ן
to,make_despicable husbands_of,their in,eyes_of,their
Here, eyes stand for seeing, and seeing means knowledge, notice, attention, or judgment. The phrase means that the women will treat their husbands with disrespect and not obey them. Alternate translation: [women will despise their husbands]
Note 4 topic: figures-of-speech / explicit
בְּאָמְרָ֗ם הַמֶּ֣לֶךְ אֲחַשְׁוֵר֡וֹשׁ אָמַ֞ר לְהָבִ֨יא אֶת־וַשְׁתִּ֧י הַמַּלְכָּ֛ה לְפָנָ֖יו וְלֹא־בָֽאָה
because,they,will_say the=king ʼAḩashvērōsh he/it_had_said to=bring DOM Vashti the,queen before,,him and=not come
The implication is that they will go on to say, “So if even the queen can disobey the king, why should I have to obey my husband?” If it would be helpful in your language, you could say that explicitly.
Note 5 topic: grammar-connect-logic-result
הַמֶּ֣לֶךְ אֲחַשְׁוֵר֡וֹשׁ אָמַ֞ר לְהָבִ֨יא אֶת־וַשְׁתִּ֧י הַמַּלְכָּ֛ה לְפָנָ֖יו וְלֹא־בָֽאָה
the=king ʼAḩashvērōsh he/it_had_said to=bring DOM Vashti the,queen before,,him and=not come
The women will stop respecting their husbands after they hear about this. You can put this report about what Queen Vashti did first, before “women will stop respecting their husbands,” because it is the reason that explains that result.
Note 6 topic: figures-of-speech / metonymy
לְפָנָ֖יו
before,,him
Here, face means the presence of a person. The phrase means the Queen Vashti refused to come into the presence of King Ahasuerus when he summoned her during the feast. See how you translated this in verse 11.
1:17 Women everywhere will begin to despise their husbands: Fear of consequences rather than facts or law motivated the council’s decision.
OET (OET-LV) If/because the_matter_of it_will_go_forth of_the_queen to all_of the_women husbands_of_their to_make_despicable in_eyes_of_their because_they_will_say the_king ʼAḩashvērōsh he_said to_bring DOM Vashti the_queen before_him and_not she_came.
OET (OET-RV) Soon women all over the empire will hear about what the queen did and they’ll say, ‘King Ahasuerus commanded his servants to bring Queen Vashti to him, but she didn’t go! Then women will stop respecting their husbands.
Note: The OET-RV is still only a first draft, and so far only a few words have been (mostly automatically) matched to the Hebrew or Greek words that they’re translated from.
Acknowledgements: The Hebrew text, lemmas, and morphology are all thanks to the OSHB and some of the glosses are from Macula Hebrew.