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OET (OET-LV) And_appeared YHWH to Abram and_he/it_said to_offspring_your I_will_give DOM the_earth/land the_this and_he/it_built there an_altar to/for_YHWH the_appeared to_him/it.
OET (OET-RV) Then Yahweh came to Abram and told him, “I’ll give this land to your descendants.” So Abram built an altar there and made a burnt offering to Yahweh, who had appeared to him.
וַיֵּרָ֤א יְהוָה֙ אֶל אַבְרָ֔ם
and,appeared YHWH to/towards Avram
Yahweh’s promise in verse 7 to give Canaan to Abram’s descendants contrasts with the fact that the Canaanites were still occupying that region (verse 6). Also, notice that the text does not specify in what form or in what way God appeared to Abram, so your translation should not do that either. Alternate translation: “Then Yahweh came to Abram” or “but Yahweh visited Abram”
Note 1 topic: writing-quotations
וַיֹּ֕אמֶר
and=he/it_said
Alternate translation: “and promised to him,”
Note 2 topic: figures-of-speech / infostructure
לְזַ֨רְעֲךָ֔ אֶתֵּ֖ן אֶת הָאָ֣רֶץ הַזֹּ֑את
to,offspring,your give DOM the=earth/land the,this
In the Hebrew text, the phrase “to your offspring” is emphasized by its position at the beginning of this quote. However, for some languages it may be clearer and more natural to change the order of the clauses and say, “I will give this land to your offspring/descendants.” Do what is best in your language. Alternate translation: “I will give this land to your offspring”
Note 3 topic: writing-pronouns
וַיִּ֤בֶן & מִזְבֵּ֔חַ
and=he/it_built & altar
Consider what is the best way to refer to Abram here in your language. See how you translated altar in Gen 8:20. Alternate translation: “So he made an altar out of large stones” or “So he built a sacrifice mound with stones”
שָׁם֙
there
Alternate translation: “near the tree”
לַיהוָ֖ה
to/for=YHWH
Alternate translation: “and burned sacrifices on it to thank and worship Yahweh,”
הַנִּרְאֶ֥ה אֵלָֽיו
the,appeared to=him/it
See how you translated appeared earlier in verse 7. Alternate translation: “who had come to him there.” or “because he had come to him there.”
12:7 The Lord appeared to Abram at Shechem (12:6) to confirm that this land was the Promised Land. Israel was to occupy this land, but sharing in God’s promises required their faith (cp. Num 14; Josh 1:6-9).
• to your descendants: Abram did not yet possess the land; he lived as a temporary settler.
OET (OET-LV) And_appeared YHWH to Abram and_he/it_said to_offspring_your I_will_give DOM the_earth/land the_this and_he/it_built there an_altar to/for_YHWH the_appeared to_him/it.
OET (OET-RV) Then Yahweh came to Abram and told him, “I’ll give this land to your descendants.” So Abram built an altar there and made a burnt offering to Yahweh, who had appeared to him.
Note: The OET-RV is still only a first draft, and so far only a few words have been (mostly automatically) matched to the Hebrew or Greek words that they’re translated from.