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OET (OET-LV) And_he/it_said god to Noḩa this [is]_the_sign the_covenant which I_have_established between_me and_between all flesh which [is]_on the_earth/land.
OET (OET-RV) Then God said to Noah, “The rainbow is the sign of the agreement that I have established between me and every living thing on the earth.”
Note 1 topic: writing-quotations
וַיֹּ֥אמֶר אֱלֹהִ֖ים אֶל נֹ֑חַ
and=he/it_said ʼₑlhīmv to/towards Noḩa
Alternate translation: “Finally, God said to Noah,” or “Then God finished by saying to Noah,”
Note 2 topic: translate-key-terms
אֽוֹת הַבְּרִית֙ אֲשֶׁ֣ר הֲקִמֹ֔תִי
sign/signal/evidence the,covenant which/who established
See how you translated a similar clause in verse 12. In that verse God is explaining the rainbow for the first time, whereas here in verse 17, he is pointing back to what he just said about the rainbow in order to emphasize its importance. Also, consider again how you translated covenant in verses 9, 11-13, 15-17. Alternate translation: “the sign which shows that I promise to always keep the covenant that I am making” or “what I will uses to show everyone that I have made this treaty”
כָּל בָּשָׂ֖ר אֲשֶׁ֥ר עַל הָאָֽרֶץ
all/each/any/every flesh/meat which/who on/upon/above/on_account_of//he/it_went_in the=earth/land
Consider again how you translated all flesh when it includes people and animals. See Gen 6:12-13, 17; 7:21; 9:11, 15-17. It may be necessary to translate this phrase in different ways in different contexts. Alternate translation: “all living creatures” or “all the people and creatures that are on the earth.”
9:8-17 God’s second post-flood speech conveys his promise and plan for preserving creation.
OET (OET-LV) And_he/it_said god to Noḩa this [is]_the_sign the_covenant which I_have_established between_me and_between all flesh which [is]_on the_earth/land.
OET (OET-RV) Then God said to Noah, “The rainbow is the sign of the agreement that I have established between me and every living thing on the earth.”
Note: The OET-RV is still only a first draft, and so far only a few words have been (mostly automatically) matched to the Greek words that they’re translated from.